22

February 2, 2007

Steve and I are at the beach, celebrating our 22nd anniversary which seems completely ridiculous. Not that we’re celebrating - but that it’s been 22 years since we took the big walk down the long aisle and said two enormous words: I DO. It’s funny how much I thought I knew about love and life and commitment and family back then.

Turns out, um…not so much.

I was woefully unprepared and way too young for everything that we would face. And yet, face it we did. And I think we’ve managed to conquer most of the stuff that wanted to conquer us and I know that we have a deeper respect and appreciation for one another then we did when our love was young and untested. Steve has put up with a lot from me. I’m not very organized. I hate house work. I’m self-focused a lot. And probably the biggest thing is that I’ve struggled with fear for most of my life. He has walked with me every step of the sometimes-arduous road toward freedom and I just can’t begin to say how much his strength and love has meant to me. In fact, I’ve probably leaned more on him than I should, which is my weakness. And he has always stayed faithful and steady, which is his strength. In that way - and so many others - he’s just a lot like Jesus.

It’s interesting when I hear young women talk about the kind of man they want to marry. What I found in Steve is just so much more than I even knew to ask for at 18. What I found in marriage is so much deeper and more real and intimate and vulnerable than I ever imagined. And what I’ve learned about the overwhelming love of Jesus by being loved by the man of His choosing has made me who I am.

Wow, Steve, thanks. I can’t begin to say how much you’ve meant to me. The best is yet to come…